He looked at her… only to receive nothing but silence… she never talked or even greeted him when they saw each other again… the whole ride to home was awfully quiet that it bothered him… she was not like that from last night…and what bothers him more now was the whole incident from earlier…
Seeing her and Youngbae together…
Seeing her in his arms…
What were those all about…?
Thoughts filled his mind…and thinking about those things over and over again makes him totally uneasy… connecting it to Youngbae’s confession… are they together now…? He almost dropped his utensils as he turned his gaze back towards her…
She didn’t bother checking on him… busy on finishing her food silently… and it bothered him more… for since earlier, she never looked at him…
Was it because of the kiss…?
He too was surprised at the sudden move from Taeyeon…but thinking that Dara already knows about him and Taeyeon… why would she be upset about it…?
His forehead creased… gripping on his utensils as the thoughts and images of her and Youngbae kept on repeating inside his head…
Gritted his teeth for even caring about it… why would he…? He’s just her husband by papers and in the eyes of everyone…just as well as she’s just his wife… and nothing more…
How could he be so selfish for thinking that she couldn’t belong to someone else… what is her to him…?
He already had Taeyeon… and definitely there’s nothing that he feels for Dara… as far as he knows…
In the end, he dropped his gaze…
He couldn’t possibly love her…? He loves Taeyeon… as far as he knows…
His thoughts were interrupted when he saw Dara stood up from her seat… he looked up in surprise upon seeing her simply walked away after finishing her food… he felt his insides dropped when she left without another word… without even glancing at him…
Confused as to what’s happening…and earning a cold treatment from her… he suppressed himself from getting mad… he continued finishing his dinner still trying to figure out why she’s acting that way.
--
She locked herself inside her secret room… staring at ‘his’ portrait that she made… with a pained expression on her face…
After a while, her tears finally stopped… she just then realized that she’s being hugged by Youngbae… her eyes snapped open and was about to pull herself away, only to be stopped when his arms snaked around her frame, hugging her tighter and closer to him…
“Youngbae-ah…”
She called him in worry… unable to hear even herself because of the music playing against her ears…
“Let’s just stay like this for a while…”
Yongbae said as he watched Jiyong who’s now looking at them with a clear confused look on his face… Youngbae’s hand formed into a fist…curling the fabric of her dress in his hand…
He then closed his eyes… leaned down as he caressed his cheek on the side of her head…
Dara was confused… her hands then reached up and rested on his back…
He probably saw what she’s looking at earlier… what could be more pathetic than that…?
Her eyes fluttered sadly… seeking more strength from her friend… she pulled him closer as she snuggled her face on his shoulder…
“Thank you Youngbae-ah…”
Jiyong was watching them from afar… couldn't decipher what he’s feeling inside not until his blank thought was interrupted by Taeyeon…tugging on his arm… he looked at her with an unreadable expression on his face…
“Let’s go oppa…”
She simply said as she locked her hand with his…he couldn’t even speak nor think of what to do…he was there to see Dara…but everything went too fast before he could even realize what’s happening… finding himself being dragged away… he could only look back… seeing the image of them hugging each other immediately brought an immense pain inside his chest…
“I already know you’re hers… but why kept on shoving it to my face Jiyong-ah…?”
“You said you won’t hurt me again… but why am I always left hurt in the end…?”
She whispered as if she’s really talking with him…
“I didn’t even know when it started… but why can’t I stop myself from loving you…?”
She said as she sighed… tracing the smiling portrait of him with her finger, she let out a bitter smile…
‘Everybody gets tired in the end… and I know you’ll get tired from loving him too…’
Telling herself as she clutched on her chest… she had endured a lot of things already… and waiting for her feelings to vanish would be another thing that she should endure now…
--
He was drying himself off when she entered their room… he looked up upon hearing the door closed, their eyes met for a minute before she continued her way towards the bathroom… only to be stopped when he spoke.
“Where did you go…?”
He calmly asked her… holding the towel he used from drying his hair on his lap.
“Just outside…”
Dara plainly answered without even facing him.
Jiyong’s brows twitched before he sighed… enduring yet another cold treatment from her.
“What did you do…?”
It took Dara a period of time before answering… she looked over her shoulder, slightly saw Jiyong still waiting for her answer.
“Catching some fresh air…”
“But it’s too cold outside…”
He immediately retaliated back… Dara could only sigh before starting again with her tracks.
“I’ll just go change…”
Upon hearing the bathroom door closed, Jiyong let out a frustrated groan as he harshly threw the towel on the floor…his hand then reached for his forehead and massaged it in much frustration…
‘What did you do this time Jiyong…?’ He asked himself…
--
It took her a while inside the bathroom but he waited for her… seated on one sofa inside their room, he looked up upon seeing her coming out…
“Can we have a talk for a moment…?”
He tried his best to be calm… but her continuous cold treatment doesn’t help him to do so… she just looked at him… not bothering to sit… she just waited for him to continue…
He stood up from his seat and walked towards her… saw that she wouldn’t even look at him straight.
“Are you okay…? Did something happen earlier at the campus…? Did they bully you or something…?”
He looked more like a dad interrogating his daughter than a husband asking his wife… Dara just shook her head as she speaks…
“Nothing… there’s nothing wrong…” she plainly said…
Jiyong looked away for a moment… his jaw tightened and brows connected as he sighed in irritation…
“Then why are you acting like this…?”
Dara finally looked at him… for a while she just stayed watching his confused face before she finally spoke…
“Really… there’s nothing wrong with me…” With that she passed by him.
“We still have a class tomorrow… we should go..-“
Her sentence got interrupted when he gripped on her arm and made her face him…
“Something’s wrong is it…?”
Jiyong’s voice was a bit impatient… and his grip on her arm was a bit tight… her eyes locked on his worried one for a while… until she looked away and shook her head no again… that made Jiyong snapped out the last patience he had in himself…
“Damnit..! Then why are you acting like this…?!”
He yelled at her still gripping on her arm tight… Dara’s eyes widen with his outburst.
“What do you want me to do huh…?! How am I supposed to act for you to be contented that nothing’s wrong… huh Jiyong…?! I already told you that I’m okay… why can’t you just drop off and move on…?”
She answered him back with the same tone as his… making him startled a bit.
“Is it because of the kiss earlier…?”
His voice trailed off… and Dara just looked away as she bit her inner cheeks suppressing herself to remember what happened earlier… Jiyong’s brows furrowed some more upon receiving silence from her… after a while, he then shook his head as he let go of her arm.
“Is it because of that…?” He asked in disbelief…
“But why… I mean…-“ he couldn’t even find the right words to say… until Dara snapped her gaze back to him and cut him off with his sentence…
“It’s not because of that… why would I concern myself about it…? You can kiss whoever you want for all I care Jiyong… it’s just… don’t make promises that you can’t even keep…”
Her voice was shaking… and Jiyong saw the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes… she looked away as her hands reached for her face to wipe off the tears from her eyes…
Jiyong was left stiffened on his spot… unable to speak more as her words continuously rewind inside his head… leaving him more confused about her last statement…
He then heard her steps as she walked away from him, leaving him still glued on his spot…
“Where are you going…?”
He asked with a plain tone…
“I want to have my sleep now if you wouldn’t mind…”
He then shifted himself, now facing her back…
“But where…-“
“I’ll be just in the guest room…”
And with that, not waiting for another word from him, she left their room…
He was still gazing on the door… unable to move at first… before he advanced his way out only to be stopped when her words brushed his mind once again…
‘Don’t make promises that you can’t even keep’
His tight hold on the knob of the door slowly loosened… until his hand dropped on his side… staring down on the floor… his other hand then reached for his forehead before brushing his fingers through his hair…
“I’m sorry…” he could only mumble in despair… only to be answered by silence…
--
The week slowly passed with them not talking with each other… mostly with her not talking to him… with her, avoiding him… and it caused him immense pain that he had never expected he would feel…
Without hearing her voice… without seeing her smile… it just felt so empty…
He could only watch her… endure her silent treatment… would stay up late every night watching her back… true… she was there… she had stayed by his side as his wife… but her being like this, he just wished he could turn back the time… on that day… he should’ve tried some more… he should’ve just stayed with her…
And now, seeing her with his best friend… them being together always, it just added more to that pain… he couldn’t take seeing her with another man… couldn’t take seeing her smile towards other men beside him…
And even though he knew how dangerous it is for him to let himself fall deeper to what he’s feeling… he couldn’t help himself but to go on with the flow… for all he cares… he just want to make things right…
--
Locking himself inside his office again… facing the window with a glass of wine in his hand… he watched as the sun sets down… just this morning, his wife went out without him even knowing where she went to… busying himself waiting for the time to pass… not minding several calls from Taeyeon… he drank down another glass…
He turned his chair around… about to pour some more alcohol to his glass only to see the bottle already empty…
He growled in frustration… letting go of his glass as he slumped down on his desk… resting his forehead on his arm… he yelled out loud… not minding his voice might echoed and pass through the room… he just want to let out everything…
“You’re f*cked up now Jiyong…”
Mumbling to himself as his face shifted to the side… seeing Dara’s face flashed his mind… his lips started to tremble… closing his eyes to suppress himself from being emotional… until slumber slowly hit him…
--
His eyes twitched before it slowly opened upon hearing the creaking sound of the door of his office… it was already dark… only having the lamp on his table serving as the only source of light…
He sluggishly pulled himself up… felt his head aching from the alcohol he just drank awhile ago… he tried adjusting his sight… rubbing his eyes to see the person who just came in…
“Jiyong-ah… the maids said you still haven’t eaten anything yet…”
He was blinded when Dara opened the lights in his office… had his arm over his eyes for awhile… trying to see his wife… who was standing by the door holding on to a tray of food…
Just then, an overwhelming feeling immediately brushed his entire body… hearing that voice again… speaking of his name… hearing her worried tone… he could only look at her…
Dara slowly went towards the coffee table as she set down the tray before looking back at Jiyong who likely too astounded to even speak a word.
“Aren’t you hungry…? You should at least eat something Jiyong…”
“Say that again…” he commanded with a cold voice…
“Huh…? What…? What do you mean…?”
He slowly stood up from his seat and walked towards her…
“My name… say that again…” he said with now a clear anticipation written all over his face…
“Jiyong… what’s wrong..?”
She then saw him closed his eyes as he smiled… her gaze landed on the empty bottle on his desk… has he been drinking…? She thought…
And before she could even ask him to it… Jiyong had quickly advanced towards her… she gasped upon feeling her self being pinned on the wall…
“Jiyong..!”
She tried to push him away only for her hands to be locked with his and pinned on the wall on both sides of her head.
“Why are you avoiding me huh…? Why are you avoiding your husband…?”
She smelled the stench of alcohol in him… and saw his tired eyes looking straight at her… she looked away and tried to push him again…
“Stop this Jiyong… you’re drunk…”
She struggled from his hold… until she felt him snuggling on her neck…
“You’re avoiding me again… why…? I just want to know why… do you know how I wanted to punch Youngbae whenever I see you two together…? Huh…? You don’t even know…”
He was not making any sense which scared Dara a bit…
“Jiyong… you’re drunk okay… let’s talk about this next time…”
She was about to push him off only to be pushed back again…
“I’m not f*cking drunk okay…! I know what I am talking about… So you don’t f*cking tell me what to do…!”
Her eyes widen in fear… and felt angry upon hearing his harsh words again… he really loves hurting her in every way he could… she thought…and with that, she gathered her strength to completely push him off of her… and immediately ran towards the door…
Jiyong let out a low groan before he ran after her… stopping her before she could even open the door… pushing the door close with his hand over her as he stood behind her…
“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to yell… I just…. I just don’t know what to do with you anymore…”
Dara smiled bitterly before she dropped her gaze on the floor…
“How many times have you told that to me Jiyong…? How many times should I hear how confused you are…? I think you should just stop from mentioning it to me over and over again because in the end you’ll just end up hurting me anyway…”
He watched the back of her head for a while… his vision blurred as tears started to form in his eyes…
“Do you think it’s that easy to tell you these things over and over again…?”
Dara looked up and felt Jiyong’s hands on her shoulders as he turned her around to face him.
“Do you think it’s that easy to just tell you how I feel…? I can’t just stake my chance… I’m not supposed to feel this way towards you…I don’t know… I just don’t know why…”
Dara couldn’t grasp what he’s trying to say… he’s clearly in the influence of alcohol… that’s probably why he’s acting that way… and as if he read what she’s thinking… he trapped her face between his bent arms as he pinned her on the door and leaned down to her…
“I’m not drunk… and I think... I love you…”
He huskily whispered… making Dara gasped and widen her eyes with his words…
"I missed you..."
He added as his hand reached for her face…he watched it as it caressed her pale complexion… smiled to himself as he saw her stunned expression, before holding the side of her head and leaned down to claim her lips…
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